2009 September

Pennies on the Track and Settling for Second-Best

September 24, 2009 By Shannon Leave a Comment

Train Tracks: Blessing or Curse? Is it an understatement to say that sometimes things don’t turn out the way that we expect? Sometimes? Ha!

Despite all our planning and scheming, we really don’t have as much control over life as we think we do.

But, I’m discovering that oftentimes, it’s just better that way.

Case in point: our vacation home this summer. We had a budget. I worked hard to find a house that would suit our family but not break the bank. Of course, it didn’t help that I began my search in May and several things were already booked. (This is the point in the story where my husband would roll his eyes.) It was a little tricky, but I finally found something that seemed to be a good fit.

The only drawback: it was right next to an active train track. I mean, RIGHT NEXT to the tracks. Literally. (Which is probably why a nicer house was still available at that point in the season. Hello, Shannon!)

The fine print assured me that the train only ran at 11 p.m. and 3 a.m. Well, that’s good when you consider safety for the family. But, a little less than ideal for sleeping…on vacation…where rest is a big part of the plan.

Deposit had been made. Too late to find something else. So, I held my breath and just hoped that it would be manageable.

Can I just tell you that the train track actually became a great family memory? Our trick: pennies on the track! A few evenings that week, we snuck out late at night and placed our pennies along the track. Sort of a pre-tuck-in routine. Next morning, still in pjs, the kids would rush out to find their flattened treasures. Pennies on the Tracks...

Somewhere else in Grand Haven, someone else was sleeping-in in a nicer house in a better location (probably closer to the beach) that they had probably secured earlier in the year. Meanwhile the pj-clad McKees were dancing in the morning light, finding freshly flattened pennies, and saving them as treasures from our time together.

The Morning Hunt Our Treasures: More Valuable Than Gems Maybe it’s just better when things don’t turn out as we expect. When our plans get foiled and we’re forced to take “second-best”. Just maybe.

Caleb on the Trax

Maddie on the Trax And, do you know that with the air conditioning running, we never even heard or felt that train rush by anyway…

Filed Under: Children, Family, Life, Randomness Tagged With: Children, Family, Randomness, Vacation

Mac N' Cheese and Beyond

September 22, 2009 By Shannon Leave a Comment

“Momma,” she said as she sidled up next to me. “I love you.” Sweet pause as she thought for a minute. “And, not just because you make mac n’ cheese.”

I was cooking up Maddie’s favorite meal: mac n’ cheese.

From a box.

The kind with a packet of powdered cheese.

Good and processed.

THAT is Maddie’s idea of a feast. You see, we have a family policy that I don’t cook separate things for each person’s tastes. I make one great, well-thought-out meal and the family eats together. Maddie is polite about it (though she wasn’t always) but she mostly just “puts up” with those meals. I’m pretty sure that she’s holding out for that Kraft box night after night.

So, in order to value each person’s tastes, I make Maddie’s favorite meal sometimes. It goes against every fiber of my being…but I do it. To bless Maddie. And, she gets so stinkin’ excited about it that it makes it worth it.

Savoring... But, I think it’s really sort of a cruel joke. You see, I pride myself on meals made from scratch and secretly mock things like refrigerated cookie dough. (Sorry to you dear friends who use it. Now you know that I’m mocking you.) For goodness sake, I even whip my own cream most of the time. I like natural ingredients and make an attempt to avoid preservatives and boxed stuff. (Which, is not an easy task in modern-day America.)

After we had Caleb and he was such a good eater, I sort of applauded our parenting. See, I thought, if you just give them variety and don’t waffle on your standards, your kids will eat well. His favorite food: my grandma’s recipe for spinach soup.

Then, God gave me Maddie. The one who would happily exist on chicken nuggets and boxed mac n’ cheese for the rest of her days. (And, maybe a little bit of fruit thrown in here and there for good measure.) I even tried making “homemade” mac n’ cheese for her once. Again, she was polite. But, she really just PREFERS the blue box.

We stuck to our guns and continued to serve her a variety of foods but it just wasn’t as pleasurable with Maddie. She eats what the rest of us eat and has learned to tolerate my made-from-scratch meals. She knows they are good for her and she does appreciate my effort. But, when I whip out that blue box, it’s like I’m speaking LOVE to her soul.

I’ve learned a few lessons from the blue box. First, I’m reminded not to take myself too seriously. I think God must have been laughing when I was patting myself on the back for raising such a good eater in Caleb. He knew Maddie was coming…and that He would have to use the blue box to address my pride. I know it sounds sort of silly, but it’s true.

Second, I’ve learned that we can’t control our children. We can serve up the good stuff and do our best to develop their taste for it. But, in the end, they have to make their own decisions.

Sometimes it will be little stuff like preferences and styles. Sometimes it will be big stuff like issues of character and faith. We give our kids guidelines, we discipline when they cross boundaries, we teach them right from wrong and truth from error, we reward their outstanding choices…but ultimately we can’t control their every appetite.

Sort of like the boy in Caleb’s grade who knows his parents don’t allow candy and such at home. So he has a stash in his locker. And begs things from other kids’ lunches at school.

If we open our eyes, there are lessons to be learned all around us. Even from those horrible blue boxes…

Pure Joy

Filed Under: Children, Cooking, Family, Homemaking, Life, Parenting, Randomness Tagged With: Children, Family

Monday Musings on Grace

September 21, 2009 By Shannon Leave a Comment

I’m not sure when it began, really. I’ve been a people-pleaser for as long as I can remember. Gauging my own worth based on how others respond to me. Seeking significance in achievement and good behavior. I suppose you could chalk it up to being the first-born. But, really, it probably has more to do with my sin-stained heart than my birth order.

Somewhere along the way God began to uproot my people-pleasing orientation. First, as a young girl when I realized that you could be pretty stellar in front of adults but pretty brutal to your younger sisters when left alone. At some level at that tender age of 9, I understood that my heart was the issue. That my actions were just an overflow of my heart and that doing the right stuff to please others wouldn’t fix my heart. The heart is too complicated for that. I knew I’d need help to tame it. Jesus, would You come help me, please?

Then there was the time in college. Young freshman woman on her first Fall Retreat with Campus Crusade. I still remember the phrase Jim Sylvester used that day as he taught us through the Paul’s letter to the Romans. “You take His breath away,” he said. Me? How could I take God’s breath away? I couldn’t wrap my brain around the idea that God actually delighted in me. That because of what Jesus had been doing in my heart, I actually took His breath away. Like a Groom glimpsing His Bride. Me who knew all the ways I was falling short. Me who wondered if people really liked me. Me who hid behind accolade. Me who wondered if I could ever measure up to the expectations I put on myself. All that junk and I could take His breath away? Could I take my eyes off of me and put them on Him? On His beautiful work in my heart? I sure wanted to try. Jesus, would you help me believe it, please?

That weekend set me on a path that would characterize the next four years (and beyond, really). College was a defining time for me as God continued to unearth my people-pleasing tendencies. Sorority sisters, professors, classmates, Bible study leaders, friends, family – at some level I was trying to impress them all. I began to realize that most times I was confusing outward “duty” with real heart change. Jesus, would You drive it deeper, please?

And, so it is today. Jesus, would You drive it deeper, please?

The questions that plague my heart are different as my life roles have changed. I’m no longer a college freshman. Instead, I’m a wife (a pastor’s wife, no less) and a mom. Instead of wondering if my professor will notice the typo on my paper, I’m wondering if my husband will notice the tasks yet undone around our home. I see my shortcomings and my failures. I know he sees them too. My first instinct is to hide.

And what about the kids? What do they think of their mother when I get all stressed and start yelling because we’re running late…again? What do they think when there’s no milk for cereal because I forgot my list when I left for errands…again? Can they sense my indecisiveness at times or my exasperation at others?

Of course, I have other roles, relationships, and responsibilities in life. Each with their own questions that rattle around my heart.

And, so the struggle that began 21 years ago on that college weekend continues today. Will I believe that it’s really about grace – God’s unmerited favor poured out on me because of Jesus? That Jesus is more concerned about my heart than my to-do list accomplishments? That His mercies are enough for today? That He is doing something beautiful with my heart even when my days are a mess? Will I let Him drive it deeper so that I find myself totally satisfied in Him?

___________

I usually start my week with a pause to list the things for which I am most thankful. Today, my list starts and ends with grace. I’m so thankful that Jesus comes full of grace and truth. Not sweeping the truth under the rug, mind you. But washing it with grace. The Gospel really is good news! It’s not about outward duty but His commitment to patiently and gently transform my heart.

Grace, grace…I’m so grateful that He does help me believe it. And that He keeps driving it deeper.

The gratitude list continues: #31 GRACE. Again and again and again…

Filed Under: Faith Tagged With: Faith, Gratitude

When the Mundane Becomes Sacred

September 9, 2009 By Shannon Leave a Comment

Well-Slept-In Bed Beds all rumpled and in need of making. Laundry piled high – waiting for the washing and the ironing. Peppers and corn still in their baskets – needing preserved before they start to go bad. The list goes on…

I’m mindful that God has me here. Right here. Right now. Bringing order and refuge to this little parcel of land.

Sometimes that means some pretty fun tasks: baking a loaf of bread, creating a new table centerpiece with sunflowers from my own garden, finding a great bargain at the second-hand store, using home-grown tomatoes and peppers to produce a warm pot of chili, planting fall flowers, Indoor Sunshine stumbling upon just the right scented candle (on the clearance rack at Pier One!).

But, sometimes, the responsibilities are just plain mundane. Ironing? Updating the kids’ chore charts? Scrubbing the gunk off the inside of the oven? Making the bed for the umpteenth time? (Side note: Umpteenth is a great word, isn’t it? My Grandma G used to say it. I laugh at myself when I use it.)

These are the tasks that sometimes fill our days. Just the mundane stuff of life. It needs done and it blesses the family but it’s not exactly fun. And, it sure doesn’t feel very significant or sacred.

And, yet, isn’t that where Jesus often met people? As they were going about their normal life chores? For example, take the woman at the well – she was just going about the normal, rather mundane, task of getting water for her home. She crossed paths with Jesus and their conversation turned her life upside down. At that well, on that day, the mundane became sacred.

Laundry Abundance And, what about me? Could my tasks be opportunities for conversations with God? As I iron Rick’s shirts could I talk to God about my husband, asking Him to give Rick wisdom as he leads our family and our church? As I make beds, could I pray for rest – both physical and spiritual? As I update chore charts, could I ask God to mold my kids into people that understand the value of hard work and responsibility? I’m not sure but maybe even the gunk in the oven could somehow be offered up to God in life-changing conversation…

Maybe all of my mundane tasks could be opportunities to commune with the Living God. Sacred moments filling my day and putting those everyday tasks into true perspective.

“Lord, I submit myself to you. I realize that You have placed me here and that running this home well is part of your plan for me. Help me to take hold of it and seize the opportunity to commune with You as I tackle the tasks for this day. Would You cause me to look for You in the midst of my chores? To even anticipate them because I know I can talk with You as I do them? As I do the jobs that will make our dwelling a refuge, remind me to pray for my family, friends, and even strangers who come into our home. Just to talk with You as I go. Lord, your Word reminds me that everything can be done “unto You.” Please help me to live that reality as the sacred and the mundane are woven together in the moments of my day.”

Today, I’m joining with others who are reflecting on prayer in their own internet places. Powerful posts. Feel free to join me as I link up with them at:

Filed Under: Faith, Homemaking Tagged With: Faith, Homemaking

Pennies on the Track and Settling for Second-Best

Mac N' Cheese and Beyond

Monday Musings on Grace

When the Mundane Becomes Sacred

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